...so how ridiculous are they?

For a hypothetical situation, if politics was indeed a subject of fine “arts”, and there was a university directly under the jurisdiction of a Private Body named Association of Former Member of Parliament, we would have had parliamentarians with graduate degrees like B.Tech (Mud-slinging), Post Graduate Diploma (“Mass” Communication) or maybe some thing like a Ph.D. (“Denial” Practices)!

The most important course offered by such a hypothetical university shall indeed a Management Training Program (read short term crash courses) in the event of a "new" fellow being accidentally elected. This will be on topics like
“Committee Formation”,
“Handling situations by recourse to Inquiry Commissions and Resignation Demands” or something like

“How to handle Law and Order Situation, when your party is in opposition”!

There have been various incidents comical debates between our elected politicians, which quite evidently reveal the obvious even though the denial is pursued till an event of the representative changes his party in the future time. This kind cacophony our Honourable Ministers indulge in, provide more entertainment than governance.

A few of them which I can recollect:

=== “Hamari desh ki Bhasha mein bolo!” by the now, Hon Minister of Railways Mr. Lalu Prasad “ji” Yadav! In his typical theatrical performance demanded that BJP’s Yashwant Sindhi, then the Finance Minister addressing the Parliament on the Budget, should be done in Hindi and not in English! Someone please ask Lalu, if he knows what “inflation” is called in Hindi! I for one have no idea! Off course, Lalu would have forgotten about it, since he was then in the opposition. And it is forbidden by the “laws of politics” to remember any issue which had prevailed during the time when you were in the opposition!

===The ever so confused Mr.Vilasrao Deshmukh has only himself to blame. During every issue he is caught on the wrong foot. When farmers were committing suicide, he was somewhere else. When Bal Thackeray was being mentioned in the Mumbai Riots case, he accidentally mentions that “There is no evidence against Balasaheb”. He must have had a phone call from Delhi, reminding him that it is Narayan Rane who has left Shiv Sena and not Bal Thackeray. Our man immediately corrects himself saying “I have been misquoted and ShreeKrishna Commission has already put in place, and report will talk”. Wonder if BJP-Shiv Sena said this to Congress “Listen guys, you keep quiet on ShreeKrishna and we keep quiet on the Bofors!”

===H D Dewe Gowda, perhaps is the most revered err remembered PM of this country. He seriously was so bored, that he would take long naps in the middle, and would simply sign on Bills, and Acts. Well, now that he has lost his sleep, I sure know why. His son Kumaraswamy definitely must have got a blank cheque signed from HD senior! No wonder father-son seemed to have distanced themselves light years apart in the near past!

I can safely assume that there isn’t any embarrassing moment than to see your own photo on cover page fast asleep. And if you happen be to the Prime Minister, the feeling can just get worse!

===Wonder whether Rabri Devi ever read any “paper” leave alone a “document” when she ran Bihar from her kitchen! Did she ever sign? I have my doubts. Even she did I believe she must have used her thumb impression on Day 1. Lalu must have heard this, and had a rubber stamp of “Rabri L Devi” home delivered! Otherwise why would have you such “respected” Public Figures being called Rubber Stamp Chief Ministers?

===The very recent incident, which I was amazed of, was again with the Gowdas! Kumaraswamy packed off all his MLAs to a Resort! This is not the first time he did that, but second in 6months! Now first, the purpose is to treat the MLAs for their “contribution” to the party. And the real reason being, so that his MLAs could not defect! He is a smart man though, with the fact that he even got mobile jammers installed all over the Resort, so that no other party member could even reach his MLAs. What about the land-phones?

===Our Advani once went to Pakistan. He was so overwhelmed by the welcome he received, that he was all at sea how to thank the Pakistanis. Guess he forgot that such welcomes are a part and parcel of political visits. Nevertheless, Advani wanted to still thank Musharaf so he began to praise Jinnah, assuming Musharaf would understand the indirect reference to him. Or was it? I am sure Vajpayee must have called up Advani and told him “Advaniji, (pause) Muslim vote (pause, pause) Pakistan mein nahi (big pause) Gujarat mein chahiye”!

===This one is fresh from today’s front page. And ridiculous of ‘em all! On the occasion of Indira Gandhi’s Death Anniversary some Madhu Koda said “Today is also Sonia Gandhi's martyrdom day...”! Err he accidentally misplaced Indira with Sonia! You can’t blame him, since his mind was perhaps on counting the number of people attending the gathering. But then the explanation comes "Apna aadarniya neta ke naam to haar waqt leteh hein (I often take her name (Sonia Gandhi), and naturally it slipped out”. Now was that required?

I wonder how and when our politician just about turn so ridiculous, that even personal image is then at behest of rhetoric they practice. There isn’t any substance left, while all they can see, if “recovery” of the money invested by their respective parties for the last election.

Off course the logic goes like this, since we invested for the election “amongst” the people, we indeed need to “recover” it back, with some “reasonable” margin, so that we are back again with fresh investments 5years later! I think such “investments” need to be made legal and rechristened as PIIs, Political Institutional Investors! Is Damodaran hearing?